July 5, 2019 – UPDATE: Lake Alert for Lake Lurna – LIFTED
Go home, Lurna. You’re drunk.
Gurl, it’s just another day with a “y” in it, ‘cuz guess what? Lurna’s all grossed up and closed for business again; probably because she was jealous about Lorna Doone getting that multi-million dollar makeover while she’s tucked away in Delaney Park like Baby in a proverbial corner.
The tea is that the City just told us that they took some samples and that she’s totally toxic … which we could have told you before the samples. Am I right?
She’s apparently got potentially high toxicity levels due to blue-green algae bloom but it was probably just all those White Claws and vodka she was downing last month for Pride.
As a precaution, the City is saying that nobody’s allowed to like, hang with her for a while; that includes refraining from swimming, recreating and irrigating in/from Lake Lurna until further notice. Cuz Lurna is nasty.
The City is gonna keep doing tests until she’s good to go again. We’ll let you know when that is but we wouldn’t hold our breath if we were you.
Editor’s Note: Lake Lurna really is a lake and you can find it in Delaney Park [GMap]. Don’t swim in it, recreate near it, or water your lawn with it until further notice.